I do have a lot of tasks to finish but my mind is so jammed up now. So let me just typed a thing that just conjured up in my mind quickly before I am lazy to type and share them with you all…
Have you all ever thought what you will be if you are not doing what you are doing now? I mean, what will Lab Papa, a scientist, or Chegu Carol, an educator, be doing now if they never get to do what they are doing now?
I was thinking about it just now (yeah.. my mind is jammed so I was trying to think of something else just to clear my mind hehe so I digress here), but belive me or not, I can’t even think of any!! Perhaps my mind was in a mess, but really, I can’t relate to do something meaningful other than what I am doing now.
When I was schooling, my parents never ‘told’ me to do something like become a doctor or a lawyer or an engineer unlike other friends parents (overheard sometimes.. bukan menyibuk lah hehehe). My mother always advice me to “just do well in school”, and I suppose she wanted to say “and good things will surely follow suit”. Perhaps because my mother is not an educated person (she never goes to school), she never have ideas like ‘become a doctor or lawyer when you grow up”. May be that too is a blessing in disguise, as I never have any pressure during school days to become ‘somebody’, all I wanted to do was ‘just do well’. Because of that too, I never thought of any career to take up as one. Although when there is a question of ‘what do you wan to become when you grow up?” – I simply answer anything, ranging from policemen, fire fighter, army etc.
I carried this mentality when I moved on to a ‘lovely’ school on a hill, of which sometimes requires it’s students to carry water from down hill to have a bath. Some cool dudes will, however have other ideas – like going to the ‘kolam’ or take a bath near the guard house with only their ‘seluar katak’. Forgive my digression.
Anyway, it’s true that I never really thought of what career I want to do. I just want to do well for my exams and whatever I want to do like sports. Though I admit I am not a bright or talented person. Never good in cricket or football or hockey. Academic-wise also the same. Perhaps jack of all trades but master of none… hahaha.. blimey!!
Only when I befriended Lab Papa that I started to ‘see things’. We were in F4 at that time and we are good friends. I started to think what I want to do. But I never ‘finalised’ what I want to do as a career, as everything seems unsuitable for me. Perhaps ‘unreachable’ too as I know my own capabilities academically. I thought I tried too hard to find a career that I tried meddling in astronomy. I always go to the library and read those kinds of books. Two other friends always joins me – Cliff and Jason. Though Cliff usually looks for chess books and Jason, martial arts. Haha.. those were the days. Maybe they wanted to be the heir to Kasparov or Bruce Lee.. hahaha
I was really into astronomy that I declared to one teacher one afternoon – I want to become an astronomer!! CRAP!!! The teacher – I forgot who he is – shot down my ‘absurd’ idea right at that moment and it really go down the drain. “Where on earth (Malaysia) you will find a job for an astronomer” he says and said many other ‘advices’ to me. I have forgotten whether Lab Papa was with me… hehehe
So, when I finished Form 5, I tried to ‘survey’ what I wanted to do. Architecture and science seems a good bet for me as I am aware of my capabilities, but again never really ‘finalised’ it. Luckily my SPM result was okay. What luck!!!
I remember Lab Papa suggested to me to apply for RPKJ. But later I said I just want to go for the normal pre-U. For the two years in pre-U, I think I ‘worked’ hard to find what I wanted to take up as a career. Eventually, I ‘found’ my strength and weaknesses. I’ve consulted close friends, seniors and lecturers, did some serious reading and ‘analysis’ and finally ‘finalised’ what I wanted to do!! Yay!!
But sadly, eventhough I was offered the place, someone else has taken it!!! Thanks to the postal service that sent my offer letter very very late!! I don’t want to go into details about this incident though..hehehe.. as my mind is already cleared up
To summarize, I applied to do something I want to do, got offered a place, but was taken up by someone else, end up doing a different course, but grown to love it.. though in the end, I was am doing something else right now, different from the course I have taken… hahahaha…
Wow, I have digressed so much. Initially I was trying to ask you all what will you be if you are not doing what you are doing now, isn’t it… hahaha.. and I end up telling something else.. really this is pure ramblings of me… cheers friends!!
Well, at least this has cleared up my jammed mind.. heheheee